the apartment snob

damn. damn. damn, james!

insert good times theme song here and bear with me:

i hate my apartment building. i admit it - as much as i try to deny it, i'm a bit of a snob - an apartment snob. i made an informed decision to move into my mixed community two years ago. my mother informed me that i shouldn't look down my nose about the people i live with because it could very well be me (truth); then she and my dad offered to pay my rent at my old apartment which was 2400 a month. the thought of having my parents pay for my rent at [then] 25 years old just was not going to work. i had too much pride not to mention i had mooched way too much off my folks [especially with my georgetown stint post undergrad graduation - btw, i come from a flower power / love, peace, and soul family] ANYWAY, with 1 br rent at $1300, i thought i struck the apartment deal of a lifetime....until the guy outside told me he paid $1 a month. yeah - you read it right, a damn dollar!

truth be told, i had apprehensions about moving here in the first place, but $1300 sounded pretty good to me for a high rise with W/D, balcony, etc... i was soooo going to save money! they aren't toooo shabby on the outside - aesthetically, they actually look beautiful and the grounds are kept very nicely.. worth the $1.3K? yeah.(doesn't that make it sound so much bigger than it really is???)

however, this past year has taught my black ass that everything that glitters ain't gold applies to the apartment world too.

ok? my building is an inferno of offenses - stay with me here:
1. a big "f*ck u" keyed on the elevator door - doesn't that just say, "welcome home?"
2. a swastika keyed into the elevator door. sorry, i can't take it - i'm completely sick, what weirdo does this? i want my damn money back.
3. trash inside the elevator on the weekends and at night.

i walk past all this ridiculousness that i see on the daily and have somehow managed to act as though i don't see it - but i'm pissed (which is sick in itself.... remember back when you couldn't eat and watch the rodney king tape at the same time? but after you saw it on cnn 100 times, you just turned pissed? it's like that feeling). finally - i enter my apartment and see a damn note slid under my door that there had been several robberies in my building during the day while people are away for work. laptops/cameras/etc have been stolen from the building. well-i-be-damned. these stay-at-home mf's are stealing while i'm out trying to make my $1.3k to pay the rent.

okay - so i am pissed. i walk down the hallway and notice that there are several doors on my hall that appear to have been jimmied. isn't this just sick? there are only so many things that i take extremely personal - character attacks and personal violations are among the top... stealing makes me absolutely sick.

i march my butt down to the "security" in my building to see if they have any of these crimes on tape. after all, they sit in front of the surveillance monitor all day, the least they could do is see some kids jimmying a door. guess what - i was wrong - "security" obviously was lying when i started asking questions. damn.damn.damn! enough of this. i'm leaving here soon to buy a place and i can not wait;this has been the greatest motivating factor of all to buy my own place asap!

anyway, in lieu of the ignorance aka many of my neighbors, i have posted a video of the "amazing racist." it's a jewish guy who pokes fun at racism, i think. it's quite obnoxious; how do you think dc would have related if he came to dc with this?

Amazing Racist - Funny bloopers are a click away